She was so pissed… I love it!
That’s my girl…

Let me tell you about Elizabeth… She’s absolutely fabulous!

She’s cooler than me, and my kids like her too!

She’s new to WordPress, and like me, has a lot of work to do… so stay tuned - it’ll be worth it!

Well, damnit!

You can read the full story here…

Let me clear up one important point for those of you who read too quickly:

This is the community marketing site for the FireFox web browser:
THIS IS NOT THE BROWSER ITSELF!

That said, I still highly recommend that you use this link, and go get FireFox - it’ll just make the whole web surfing experience thing better and safer.

Wake up and smell the technology, baby!

And you wonder why we’re always in such a bad mood!

I’ve switched to WordPress… and I’m hosting w/ Dreamhost…

None of the free services offer the level of customization that I want. I want some modicum of uniqueness to my blog… Also, only the installable platforms like this and MovableType (which isn’t as free as I want it to be) seem to offer “Catagories” - which is a big deal, if you ask me.

I got started on MindSay… It was sufficient in terms of giving me a place to write and say a few things I wanted to say - and to respond to people there who had opinions on my matters… but as time has gone by, I wanted to branch out. I’m not so concerned about being part of a community attached to the blog host - the blogosphere and Google can help me with that. I want the underlying technology to be as robust as possible - that is, I want my bells and whistles.

So with WP, I’ve got everything I need. All the themes I could ever want, and the ability to build my own, or customize/extend someone elses. I can have categories - this is huge - both of links and posts. And I’ve got TrackBack - that’s the community piece I was talking about earlier. Bloggers don’t have to all be on the same service to communicate and refer to each others blogs and posts therein.

Also, I found Dreamhost. Holy SHIT! The price-for-performance just isn’t matched anywhere I was able to find!

Long story short, I’m stoked!

I was feelin’ like a creep
As I watched you asleep
Face down in the grass,
in the park,
in the middle of a hot afternoon.

Your top was untied
And I thought how nice
It’d be to follow the sweat down your spine…

–
Dave Mathews Band
Stand Up - 2005
Dreamgirl

Try to contain yourself!

• Geek (.wmv)
• Muscles (.mpg)
• The Outfit (.wmv)
• S’all Good (.wmv)
• I feel great (.wmv)
• Help me, Odell (.wmv)

And last, but by no means least, a MOVIE (QuickTime) I definately plan to see this summer!

Have a GREAT Weekend!!

The Director of Safety & Security where I work is a self-righteous, narcisistic, massive prick.

Perhaps another time, I’ll go into detail on why that is, but I don’t think he deserves the effort.

Sufficed to say, during the lay-offs that transpired here last week, the rumor was that he was going to be part of it. So strong was the rumor, in fact, that several people went out of their way to say good-bye to him, right to his face! He fired back with a self-important email to everyone saying it was all conjecture and that we’re stuck with him.

This morning, I arrived to find a wonderful email from him to the entire company, basically telling us that he’s leaving us next Friday. I hope he’s embarassed. I hope he feels humiliated.

I have no patience for people like him.

He never showed me any courtesy, consideration, or respect - so he gets none from me.

Good riddens!

Parental Discretion is advised! If you don’t want to read about dead baby bunnies, move along to another entry now! What follows is my accounting of the incident from earlier today that will serve as the indefensible, undeniable, immutible reasoning for the idea that I will burn for eternity in hell - no chance at paradise, no purgatory - do not pass GO, don’t waste time with judgement - into the pit with me.

It’s not funny. It’s not happy. It’s not sarcastic or ironic.

Mowing my lawn today - for the first time in like 3 weeks. The back yard was pretty thick - like about 8″ deep. I looked down and saw a bloody chunck of fur pop out the side discharge…

My heart sank - and I’m not a warm-fuzzy sensitive type of guy - not that I purposely torture animals for amusement on a Tuesday nite (that was back in college - I was a different guy then, and I’ll tell you that a shaved cat amped up on cocaine is the funniest fuckin’ thing you’ve ever seen in your life!).

I stopped the mower and immediately backed up… I thought maybe it was a mouse, or a mole or something - not a baby bunny…

Please, God - you miserable bastard, haven’t you tortured me enough already? Don’t let it be a cute, soft, defenseless, innocent, baby bunny…. Please… Please!!!

Shit.

There were the other 2…. deaf, scared, and twitching…

I’m yelling now… pointing at the sky…

I run into the house, and ask my wife for something to put the remaining bunnies in so I can get my bearings.

Ever buy strawberries at the store? Then come in that plastic to-go container with all the holes… Perfect! Something’s telling me it would be a bad idea to touch them at all…

I head back outside… now there’s only one - he’s got a little blood on his nose. Well? What the fuck? Where’s the other one? I’m walking around the area… walking… with my feet… and my 200+lb. frame…

Squeek. Crunch…

SHIT!! DAMNIT - DAMNIT!! I’m jumping around like a paranoid crack-addict who’s just been stung on the bottom of his foot by a bumble-bee.

2 down… 1 left…

I scoop the remaining baby bunny into the strawberry container. I bring him in the house. My 3-year old daughter wants to keep it. Of course she does… Now she’s crying… Daddy! I love the bunny!

I’m imagining that the Devil really does look like Dave Grohl from the Foo Fighters - he played Satan in the video for Tenacious D’s song, Tribute. See ya soon, chief!

I’m back outside scooping up baby bunny bits into a garbage bag. The one I stepped on is still moving - I’m wondering if it isn’t so bad. He’s making noises and trying to go somewhere - where the hell is he going?

Twitch. Twitch. Nothing.

Unconscious? I scoop him up with a twig from a nearby tree - I’m not gonna leave any scent from me on him - mom (where the FUCK is mom by the way??) will definately not be happy with that! I’ve got an old dog house in the back corner of the yard. I’m walking over to put this one in there when I realize that his back is broken - bunnies do NOT fold up like that. SHIT… again.

I’ve left the other bunny inside while I finish mowing the lawn… I’ve got to be at my mother-in-law’s in like 90 minutes. I’m tired, sunburnt, and I have to take a shower because I smell from 2 days worth of body-odor sweat, and like gasoline from the mower.

When I’m done mowing, I take the one live remaining baby bunny and set him ever so gently under the shady oak tree in my back yard. He looks up at me, nose and whiskers twitching, as if to say, “I forgive you, you god-forsaken bastard - you’re gonna rot in hell, but I forgive you.”

Great.

We just got back from the fireworks… I went to see if he’s still under the tree…

Sure enough…

Mauled by a neighborhood cat…

Damnit. I’m going to live a long and full life - followed by an eternity of fire and pain.